Okay… I’m giving in, I’m going to do it. I’ve been sat on this for a while, but I feel like I’ve reached the point of no return. I can no longer keep it in.
THIS IS SHIT.
I am all for being positive, but does anyone else feel like it’s an unofficial rule being forced upon us, that we have to be super positive and happy about this whole pandemic? Lots of things are irritating me throughout this, I keep telling myself that everyone else seems so happy, I must be the only one. But then I remember we are all human! Surely there are others out there imprisoned in their houses fed up like me? Just too scared to voice their thoughts, not wanting to upset the happy people enjoying their new-found quiet life.
Obviously there are lots of things that are totally rubbish right now and having wonderful friends and family all in this together with you certainly isn’t one of them. I will forever be grateful for the special people in my life, but have you noticed some of the things we are constantly saying in every conversation? Whether people are saying it to us or we’re the guilty party suggesting these ideas to our friends they are phrases that will be burned in our brains forever.
If you are one of those genuinely happy people, taking some sort of pleasure from all of this. Hats off to you. I admire you and I am very very jealous. If you are one of those people I advise you to turn away now, you don’t need to read my negative rant about the doom and gloom Covid-19 has created. You carry on doing you. If however, you, like me, are feeling hard done by, robbed, betrayed and angry with the current situation then keep reading, you may be able to relate.
1. “Well it could be worse…”
Yes it could be, it could be WAY worse. Last weekend we ended up watching War of the Planet Apes or whatever that monkey film is called – who knew you don’t actually have to go out and earn yourself a hangover until 5am every Saturday night? Anyway, being at war with apes and dying from a primate disease I have decided would be a lot worse than Covid-19 and kind of reminded me it could be worse. BUT if it was worse, then I’d be in a much worse mood?? End of conversation.
2. “Why don’t you bake something?”
Do people not understand that naturally fat people can’t just bake a delicious, calorific treat and then not consume the whole thing? Point in case: I baked the most mouth-watering cookies last week. Ate 8 of them in 2 days. Decided they were so good I needed more, baked 2 more batches the following day and they were eaten just as quick, funny enough, I didn’t track them on My Fitness Pal… So, I absolutely could bake a cake every day, but don’t really fancy piling on the pounds, because then not only will I be sad every time I look in the mirror and remind myself I don’t have six perfectly Instagram filtered abs, I’ll be even sadder when my clothes won’t fit me when eventually we are allowed to leave our houses. Also, have you actually tried getting flour??? It’s more sought-after than toilet paper and harder to substitute…
The insanely delicious vegan cookies I whipped up!
3. “What have you been up to?”
Urm, did I miss something? WE ARE IMPRISONED IN OUR HOMES. I’VE BEEN UP TO NOTHING. I know it is innate for us human folk to always start a question with the infamous, “What have you been up to?” but for me it’s just another sore reminder of all the things I should have been up to. Believe me when I say, I’ll never be down again, it will all be up when lockdown is lifted. Forget my, “No it’s a school night!” rule, whatever the time or day I am there. If this has taught me anything, it’s that life is too short to waste opportunities drinking martinis.
4. What’s happening with the wedding?”
How long is a piece of string?? Believe me when I say, your guess is as good as mine! Turns out the magical wedding year is about as magical as one of those cheap magic trick wands you can buy from the seaside joke shop. And if you never had the privilege of being dragged their as a poor British child, just to confirm, 0% magical. Your wedding is one of the most important, memorable times in your life (especially if children aren’t in the picture – which they aren’t). Aside from the heartbreak and the money loss, if it is cancelled/postponed it means it will be even longer for us that we’re not married. We’ve been together 8 years this year and engaged for 2. It’s been a long time coming. On this point, my advice to anyone planning a wedding is don’t. Don’t waste the money on stupid things, the stress on who to invite and the time on table plans. Get married the two of you and have a party. It’s about you and your husband/wife to be and times like this remind you of that. Like many unlucky brides to be, I have no control over the situation so I cannot make the choice of postponing, I have to do that dreaded “wait and see”. Fingers crossed I’ll still have a husband to be when this is all over…
This will be me, minus the small humans. This is what the Internet was made for.
5. “At least you’re being paid…”
I would always say my controversy levels are that of vanilla ice cream. It is rare I would ever voice a strong opinion or preach about views in a public forum or even to my friends. The last thing I want this to do is offend but I’m being honest. Yes I am getting paid. And yes I am SO grateful for this. The thought of not being able to pay my mortgage would mean even less sleep than I’m currently getting. As a teacher, I am still working , I am simply working from home in a different way. But just because I’m being paid, it doesn’t mean I can’t be sad or grumpy or find this hard – does that make sense? I’m not doing Instagram lives crying about how hard life is. I’m not moaning daily over social media about how much I hate life, I am well aware there are people way worse off, no one is disputing that, but I am allowed to have days where I’m utterly fed up with it all. I am trying my best to support small businesses and self-employed friends and will continue to do so when this is over. I think, what I’m trying to explain is that getting paid doesn’t take away the anxiety, the restlessness, boredom, fear, worry, uncertainty, stress, upset etc. I appreciate that it allows me to live in my house and pay my bills. But as we’ve been told our whole lives: money can’t buy you happiness and it doesn’t solve all of your problems. Mic drop.
6. “Have you seen the news?”
It’s all I’ve seen. Totally obsessed and I am well aware I’m a complete hypocrite writing this one. I don’t know how many times I’ve said the phrase: well I read this article.. blah blah. I’ve read so much, I don’t know what to believe anymore. It’s so hard to get a handle on when there is so much information being sent out. I don’t feel like I can believe anything I see or read because it’s all so conflicting. It’s this whole waiting and seeing business. Not definitive time scales, no end game, no light at the end of the tunnel, a tad dramatic but is that not how it feels?
7. “Just think of how clean the house will be!”
Turns out, no matter how clean your house is, when you’re stuck in it 24/7, it in fact gets messy again real quick. Don’t get me wrong, everyone likes a clean house and having all this spare time means there’s no excuse. But when you then can’t leave your clean house for nothing more than a quick shop run for the essentials, you can’t appreciate the clean and tidiness. And let’s be really honest, unless your Mrs Hinch (who happens to earn a lot of dollar cleaning) you don’t really enjoy scrubbing your toilets or organising your sock drawer. Come on, if you weren’t allowed to show your tap to tidy in your insta story would you actually do it? So after 4/5 weeks in lockdown I can cofidently say I’ve never cleaned/tidies so much but that’s because I’ve spent more time here in those weeks (and subsequently created more mess) than I have in the previous 4 years. Therefore my house isn’t any cleaner than usual, just regular clean.
8. “Try and get in a routine.”
Harder that it sounds. Turns out when you have no jobs on your to do list and no small humans that depend on you for survival your reasons to get out of bed are pretty sparse. Routine is hard when there is no purpose to your day. Over the Easter holidays, my days were completely empty. When you are (normally) such an organised, regimented person the thought of losing track of days is just incomprehensible. But when your usual never-ending job list is suddenly paralleled into the abyss and frozen in that weird “waiting and see” state the only thing that marks the time is early sunlight through the window indicates get out of bed/time for coffee and late sun-setting, skies turning to dark means it’s time for a gin and another sleepless night. What have I become?
My quarantine life right now…
9. “In these unprecedented times…”
If I hear that word any more I could cry. Did anyone actually know this word existed before this world pandemic? Did anyone ever actually use it before Covid-19 happened? It’s used every single day by every single news reporter, and now it’s found its way into every single Facebook status and social media post – I just can’t take it anymore, so I thought I’d offer some alternative adjectives to describe the current state of affairs we find ourselves in. Feel free to use any of the following below (my personal fave is freakish – can we get that trending?):
10. “So when do you think we’ll be out of lockdown?”
Spoiler: NOBODY KNOWS!!!!! Is there honestly any point wasting oxygen discussing this? Why are we still debating this? Obviously we’re all eager to find out the answer but when the government don’t know, nor the medical chiefs of health advisers, so I’m pretty confident your friend’s cousin’s wife Sharon doesn’t actually know for sure that it’s ending in 2 weeks. Looks like we’re going to have to do that famous “wait and see”, I think we’ll be really good at that by the time this is all over…
Really my point with all of this is we’re all enduring this. Some are finding pleasure in it, others are finding it more difficult. Some people are struggling with health; others money. Loneliness, anxiety and disappointment too. At the end of the day, we are all entitled to feel how we want to feel. We are all allowed to deal with this in our own way and not be judged (as long as you aren’t being an arsehole).With everything in this world, there will always be people worse off but always people better off too. That’s life. It’s not a competition, so until the day we are reunited with the pubs, clubs, football, happy hour and our friends and families, let’s just try to be understanding and kind.
P.S Jokes aside, I love my family and friends and do feel very fortunate in all of this. I have upmost respect for the people facing this every day on the front-line and have been doing what I can to support the self-employed and small businesses, also HUGE shout-out to those parents trying to keep little humans occupied 24/7, but we’re allowed to be a little grumpy from time to time. Take care and wash those hands x
With over 1.8 million miniature dachshund tags on Instagram, it’s fair to say these little sausage-like dogs are making a name for themselves. And it’s no wonder with their incredibly unique body shape!
According to The Kennel Club, the number of dachshunds registered with them in the UK has increased by 80% in the last five years, and that obviously doesn’t include all of the non-KC registered pups! A quick google search reveals lots of snooty “dog experts” (if that’s a thing) worried about increased back problems in the breed, claiming that this huge increase in popularity is all down to a celebrity craze and the use of sausage dogs in popular TV adverts. But I’m just going to stop right there: this is where I disagree! Have these so called experts not seen sausage dogs??? One look at those long bodies and short little legs and who wouldn’t fall in love? Who cares what dog a z-list celeb wants, people want a sausage dog because they’re bloody adorable!
In 2016, we became the very proud parents of our four-legged fur baby Hershel: a miniature, chocolate and tan dachshund. He has totally stolen our hearts and 3 years on, we’re looking to expand our pack with another sausage. So if you are intrigued as to why these little wieners are so popular or you are thinking of welcoming one home yourself, see below for my ultimate top 10 reasons why dachshunds are the best dog on the planet!
1. They come in a range of sizes, colours and coats – the possibilities are endless!
Let’s start with the basics. If you aren’t familiar with the breed you may not realise that dachshunds come in three sizes. Two officially, but more recently a third in between size is being recognised. Miniature dachshunds, the smallest type, are generally around 4-5 Kg, which make them a popular choice among perspective dog owners. Standard dachshunds, that are less common, are much larger and longer of course and can weight between 9-12 Kg. Then we have the in between tweenie size: basically a dog that falls in between the two official sizes. Simple! In addition to size, they also vary in colour and coat! Dachshunds can have smooth, long or wire-hair coats: all totally beautiful in their own way, but smooth (in my personal opinion) requires the least maintenance! Now the colours are the best part, there are so so many (see below) but my faves are chocolate and tan – I have to say that because that’s what Hershey is – and chocolate dapple!
Hershel and his mate NedI don’t own this, it’s from a simple google image search! But v informative!
2. They are cuddle monsters
No really. All they want to do is cuddle. First thing in the morning? Let’s cuddle. Lunchtime? Cuddles please. Evening? More cuddles. Bedtime? Please let me cuddle you. There cuddling skills certainly come in handy: firstly they transform into the ultimate neck pillow. Not only does it mold to your neck, it’s also heated which brings me on to my next point – sausage dogs are the hot water bottles that just keep giving. If morphing into any desired shape wasn’t enough, they stay hot all night long! No need to boil the kettle, no need to refill! Have I sold them to you yet?
See, wasn’t lying about the neck pillow trait.
3. They look like hot dogs
This one is self explanatory, I mean come on just look at them! Who doesn’t want a dog that looks like a hot dog.
4. They hate the rain
When I researched the breed this was perhaps one of the winning traits that helped me know me and my future sausage child would be made for each other. Forget muddy walks and rainy adventures: these dogs will do anything to escape a walk in the cold. I mean, is it any wonder? The poor little things have such short legs their bellies practically graze the ground. Now imagine it’s wet grass, so it’s totally understandable that they would much rather be cuddled up under a blanket some where in the warmth. Excellent – me too. However, I must warn you, this does have a downside. If it’s raining, they will absolutely refuse to go outside to do their business. No matter how strong and persistent you are they will remain defiant. On many dreaded rainy days in the past we have found ourselves playing hunt for the hidden poop (gross, but true). You’ve been warned.
Spot Hershel being carried over the puddle!
5. Their ears blow in the wind – think Dumbo
Now I don’t think they like this too much (think back to point number 4) but if you happen to go for a walk on a windy day, just wait for the magic to happen and be sure to get a picture for the gram!
It was a bit windy on our annual Christmas morning walkies!
6. The Halloween costumes are ENDLESS
Now, by no means am I claiming that all miniature dachshunds will allow you to freely dress them as you see fit, but in my experiences, daxies LOVE a new outfit and will happily parade around your local park in an array of costumes. From spiders, to reindeer, sombreros to tracksuits, I’ve had Hershel in it all, and he’s loved every second*
*No actual evidence to suggest this is true…
And by the looks of it, I’m not the only dog mother that is partial to a little dog fancy dress. A quick browse on the gram and there is a plethora of outfits. If ever you need to cheer yourself up, take a look!
Just some of our fave costumes from the past couple of years
7. They offer the protection of a Doberman, with a fraction of the poop!
It’s true. Don’t let their size fool you. They may look like a handbag dog, but believe me when I say they certainly aren’t. They are fiercely loyal and protect their master. They have an almighty bark, (due to the size of their lungs) alarming you of intruders, or more likely a pigeon in the garden. I do steal a laugh when visitors arrive at the door, hearing the bark, expecting an Alsatian and then seeing a little sausage – in a jumper – stood there. Again though, there is a downside to this. Lots of websites explain how dachshunds can be unfriendly towards strangers and very “barky”, so they do need lots of socialisation and consistent training, otherwise you might end up with some very unhappy neighbours.
8. They are totally adorable – just look at them
Honestly, find me a cuter dog. Don’t get me wrong, nearly all dogs are cute when they’re puppies – who doesn’t love puppies? But how many dogs remain cute FOREVER? Dachshunds do! Even when they’re a little grey and those bellies get closer to the floor, they still win the crown of most adorable dog. Let’s ignore the fact Hershel came third in the “Most Handsome” round, I’m not bitter or anything but the judges were definitely biased towards the rescue dogs…
9. They LOVE to sleep
You have to remember, when you commit to a dog, it’s not just for Christmas! In a Dachshund’s case, they could be part of your family for up to 16 years so you need to ensure the breed you pick will fit in with your lifestyle. This is why daxies are great – they just love a snooze. They will sleep anytime, anywhere! No need to worry yourself with trying to fit in long walks on those busy days, or hours of throwing the ball to play fetch. They are totally content, snuggles on your lap having a snooze. That sounds good to me.
10. They attract attention
You probably won’t believe me when I tell you about this last one, but honestly it’s true. Everyone loves sausage dogs and turns out, despite how incredibly popular they are now, many people don’t have their own (can’t understand why not) or have ever really seen a little sausage trotting along! So when you go to your local park prepare for a continuous chorus of “oooohhhhs” and “awhhhhhs” from just about everyone. The excited kiddies razzing around on scooters, “Mummy look! A Sausage dog!” and then you get the “Oh he’s gorgeous, is he a dachshund?” And even some of the grumpiest, unfriendly people you pass can’t help but steal a second glance. Hershel, of course, takes all of this in his stride with a kind of, I’m cute and I know it attitude. If people do come in closer for a little stroke Hershel kind of gives them (what we call) the stink eye, turns his nose up and carries on trotting (think back to point 7). This one time (not at band camp) we were completing our usual circuit around the lake when a lady and her very muddy child stopped us for what I assumed would be the usual, “Oh my god, he’s adorable, how old is he? Can we stroke him?” routine. But I was wrong. In fact, she excitedly said, “Oh my goodness, is this Hershel from Instagram!?” To which for the first time, after she had said this out loud in a public space, I realised how utterly crazy I must seem to have an Instagram account for my dog!!!!!! Obviously I played it cool, simply replying with yes, yes it is Hershel… Then we continued with all of the usual questions., but like I say, they really do attract attention and I probably am really really sad.
@hershel_the_sausage
So there you have it, 10 reasons why dachshunds are the ultimate dog breed of choice for anyone! Don’t get me wrong, they aren’t always the easiest dog, but their character, cuteness and cuddles sure does make up for their stubbornness!
Now, I wouldn’t be very responsible if ended this post here, so here comes the boring (but very important) stuff…
If you are thinking of welcoming a little sausage into your home, please please do your research. Google is great or join a dachshund group on Facebook. I’m a member in a few of these groups and they are so incredibly helpful. Lots of perspective dog owners post questions and people are very willing to share their experiences. Dachshunds aren’t cheap and neither is their insurance (due to their potential back problems) so make you sure you can afford to give them the best quality life, that they of course deserve. So if you’re still interested and want some sausage dog love for the time being, see below for my favourite sausage dog accounts on Instagram:
@montyminidachshund – apparently the UK’s no 1 dachshund on insta!
@zeusthedach – all the way from Australia!
@southshieldsausage – the most gorgeous chocolate dapple!
@buddythedappledachshund – Buddy, Bella and Stella – there’s 3 of them!
@albus_and_elsie – with a name like Albus, you know this will be cool!
@digitdax – another account making me realise we need another dog!
@_sausage.squad_ – oh my god, there’s 5 of them! AHHHHHHHH!
Unless you’re living under a rock, you will be familiar with the veganism lifestyle and the increasingly popular pledge, “Veganuary“: it’s simple. Only vegan friendly, plant-base foods for the entire month. People from around 178 countries take part in this diet change and with 300,000 of us from the UK signing up this year, clearly, as a society, we are becoming more accepting of eating less meat and perhaps coming to terms with the impact agriculture has on our planet. But one quick Google search and you’ll find yourself wading through hundreds of “Why I’ve ditched Vegan” articles and studies claiming that a plant-based diet will leave you lacking in vital nutrients. Is this celebrity endorsed lifestyle a con? Is it just the 2020 fad, think back to the 1950s when smoking was the epitome of cool and glamour. In 70 years will we look back in shock horror, like we do with smoking now?
Regardless of any of the above, I’m doing it because I NEED TO FIND OUT FOR MYSELF. In a world where we overshare and (sometimes forcefully and unwanted) give our opinions constantly, people are quick to tell you what they think, and sometimes we take this as gospel. But, with all of these mixed reviews, the only way I can make my mind up is by making the pledge and committing to the plant-based life for 1 month. So whether you’re anti vegan, pro farmers and meat or you’ve been dabbling with veganism (like me) or you’re even just considering it in the future, keep reading to find out why I’m jumping into the world of tempeh and nutritional yeast flakes (no, I’m not joking).
Background – let me fill you in…
For as long as I can remember, I had always said I wanted to be a veggie before I turned 30, but that’s all it was – words. I mean, I was never a big meat eater (as a child, my mum would buy me and my brother a hot sausage roll if we were out, I’d eat the pastry he’d eat the meat – perfect) but I was always partial to a KFC fillet burger, or on a special occasion, a Five Guys little burger. It was rare I’d go out of my way to cook meat at home, but I wouldn’t say no to a beef lasagna, or my partner’s Thai chicken curry. Then came the light-bulb moment…
Light-bulb moment: DING
In October 2020 I watched Cowspiracy; that day I became a fully-fledged vegetarian, goodbye nuggets, I don’t need you no more. Now, if I’m speaking totally candidly (please don’t hate me) it wasn’t necessarily about the animals. I’m sorry, as I type it I know that sounds mean. Don’t get me wrong, I am an animal lover. I donate to charities, I’ve signed petitions, I’ve boycotted elephant rides, circuses and even zoos as I’ve got older, but I don’t think it was the animals are suffering needlessly angle that hooked me in. It was this:
Animal agriculture is responsible for 18 per cent of Greenhouse Gas emissions, more than the combined exhaust from all transportation. – And all this time I thought it was the cars causing the problems!
Growing feed crops for livestock consumes 56% of water in the US. – This is just crazy.
2,500 gallons of water are needed to produce 1 pound of beef – WTF??
And then finally, the biggy:
Animal agriculture is the leading cause of species extinction, ocean dead zones, water pollution and habitat destruction.
Honestly watching it all, I just couldn’t comprehend it. I would like to think I’m an educated person who keeps up to date with current affairs but how did I not know this? Why did I not realise that agriculture was impacting our planet so severely? I felt angry, conned: I needed to find out more.
What the Health
Okay, so it’s another Netflix documentary, don’t laugh, but I was hooked. Now this one was definitely more for me. Less animal focused more health focused, investigating the link between diet and disease. Selfish I know, but I want to know what veganism can do for me, obviously if I’m saving animals and the planet that’s great, but what direct benefits will I experience? Turns out, according to What the Health, I will receive an extraordinary list of benefits by ditching the meat and eating plant. Some of the most harrowing:
One serving of processed meat per day increases risk of developing diabetes by 51% – 51%!!!!!
Eating 1 egg per day is just as bad as smoking 5 cigarettes per day for life expectancy – ARE YOU KIDDING ME????
Dairy is linked to many different types of cancer – frightening.
Pharmaceutical industry sells 80% of all antibiotics made in the US to animal agriculture – Question 1: why do they need so many antibiotic? Question 2: does this mean we’re eating meat packed with random medicines? Gross.
Now, before you start leaving angry comments saying that the documentaries I have listed were created by the same people (I know that) and they are totally one-sided (I know that too, they are definitely pro-vegan), remember, I am simply explaining WHY I have decided to attempt Veganuary. The documentaries fulfilled their purpose: they hooked me in and provoked me to question. If you Google the documentaries, there are many articles “debunking” the facts they refer too and slating why their bold claims are not entirely true, but like I said, I want to find this out for myself. Every idea in the world has pros and cons, for and against arguments. Look at Brexit and the controversy that caused. I am not going to preach that we should all eradicate meat and dairy from our diets, likewise I am not going to continue to costume scrambled eggs for breakfast if they are causing me serious long term harm.
So what changed?
In October 2019, after watching the above documentaries, I went cold turkey – no pun intended. That day I quit meat. Something inside me switched, I know longer wanted to consume meant. Maybe it was the awful hidden camera videos from Cowspiracy of meat exploding with puss, maybe it was the intricate graphs showing the correlation of cancer and meat, who knows? But my mind was made up, I was going meat (and fish) free. But I wasn’t done. Eggs: they had to go too. The United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) admitted that eggs cannot legally be labelled: nutritious, low fat, part of a balance diet, good for you, healthy or SAFE. How could I unlearn this? Then there was the milk. One question ringing in my head: you’re not a baby cow, so why are you drinking cow’s milk? Okay, so dairy milk needed to go too! So there it was, I said goodbye to all meat, fish, and then eggs and dairy milk in isolation (so I still ate chocolate that contained cow’s milk and would eat cake that contained eggs).
Easier said than done?
It’s the 3rd of January and I have had a completely meat and fish free diet for nearly 3 months. It’s been easy. I don’t miss meat. It’s that simple.
The good:
I’ve learnt to really appreciate vegetables: mushrooms are the most under-rated food out there and avocado is just a food of the Gods.
I take more care in looking at the ingredients that go into the food I eat: I don’t want any sneaky pork gelatin in my sweet treats!
I’m eating more beans and pulses, which are full of fibre, vitamins and minerals.
OAT MILK – oh my goodness, oat milk is THE nicest milk out there, I switch between Soya (cheaper and more easily available) and Oat. Oatly is my favourite.
Without getting too graphic, let’s just say my digestion has improved significantly…
Now, I have no evidence for this one, but my energy levels seem to better than ever, but like I say this could be down to my increased coffee consumption!
The bad:
Calories. As a serial dieter and upcoming bride, it’s important I calorie control my diet. I have swapped my usual chicken/tuna and cucumber lunch for hummus or falafel which has waaaaay more calories.
Limited restaurant options. Now by no means is this everywhere, because most places have fab and ever expanding veggie and vegan choices, but smaller, independent establishments have seen me trying to concoct a main out of side dishes!
Costs. I don’t care what anyone says, some of the plant-based veggie options are so much more expensive.
Cheese glorious cheese, my downfall. I started over-compensating my lack of meat with cheese which is obviously not good at all, but don’t fear this is under control now!
What now?
It’s day 3 of Veganuary and despite popular belief, I have died through lack of cheese. It probably helped that I ate an entire fridge full of cheese before the new year… I’m feeling motivated and determined to stick to Veganuary and do it properly. I am looking forward to trying new foods and restaurants, but with all of the big supermarket chains and world fast food restaurants launching naughty vegan treats (KFC, no chicken burger; Greggs vegan ring donut and steak bake; McDonald’s veggie finger meal) I will need to ensure I continue to track my calories to avoid that unwanted weight gain. I’m not going to kick myself if I unknowingly eat something that isn’t vegan, I’m learning. I’m mostly just hoping that after 4 weeks I will be able to officially decide if I want to commit to a vegan lifestyle for the foreseeable or I will just continue to be a veggie that makes vegan choices (minus the eggs and cow’s milk).
To anyone out there trying Veganuary – good luck! My biggest source of inspiration and motivation is Instagram (shock), there’s just so many fab, informative accounts. To anyone intrigued by some of the facts I’ve mentioned: please watch the documentaries (all available on Netflix). Finally, to any anti-vegans: please spread your arguments/anger elsewhere. I have not written this to persuade you one way or the other. I have simply shared my experience and thoughts on the subject. If you have nothing nice to say, please don’t say anything at all!
It’s January the 1st. Day one of 2020 and even more significantly, the very first day of this new decade. This time of year is prevalent for reflection and looking back, thinking ahead etc. And, I think as much as people share the memes taking the p out of people who do it on social media, I think it’s necessary. If we don’t reflect, we can’t learn and won’t grown. If we don’t evaluate we can’t appreciate the good and work on the bad. So here it goes. A little self-reflection on life so far.
2009
10 years ago I was 16, I’d just met my first boyfriend, who just happened to be leaving our local town to join the army. God it was so dramatic, genuinely felt like my heart had broken into a million pieces waving goodbye to him on the platform. It wasn’t until a year later I learnt the true meaning of a broken heart. I lost my nan and everything spiraled – the life I had always planned and worked so hard for started slipping away and I ended up with a one way ticket to Sri Lanka. So as you can imagine, I never believed I could ever be as happy as I am now.
Sri Lanka
I feel like my experience shaped who I am today so significantly, I should probably explain a little. Despite the sadness that caused me to travel, unintentionally the trip shaped my entire life. I spent 3 months travelling Sri Lanka, volunteering in orphanages, schools and elephant sanctuaries. I learnt to appreciate my own company, take risks and be brave, be confident in my own skin, allow myself to feel (to cry – something I still find difficult) and realise that despite my less I was incredibly lucky. One night, it was dark, so fairly late, I popped to the local (and only) shop in the village with some of the others living in my hostel. As we entered the shop a little face on the floor caught my eyes, a hand reached out asking for food or money. It was one of the children I had spend the day teaching at school. This was her life. Go to school to try and learn something to help her family, then sit on the streets at night to beg for food. She wasn’t alone. She was holding her baby sister in her arms. What life is this? How could I be so selfish? I lost someone, it’s part of life and happens to everyone. Perspective helped me heal and still does today.
See you later 2019!
I’m now 26, and probably in the best shape of I’ve ever been – no really, when you see the before and afters I just wish I would have found a healthy lifestyle sooner but don’t worry, that blog’s coming! In 2019 I actually stuck to the gym and found huge love for Bodypump classes! We’ve just celebrated our fourth Christmas in our home with our gorgeous four-legged baby Hershel: a miniature dachshund, who turned 3! 2019 has made me fall in love with work again, I’ve had the best year of my career so far at a fab primary school, with the most incredible children and a super team of educators. I embarked on a professional development journey with Microsoft Education, and the cherry on top? In December it was announced I had been selected to travel to Australia to represent the UK in March at the Global Education summit – eeeeeek! I’ve had the privilege of watching my friends become wives and mothers and felt so much love. So all in all, 2019 has been a pleasure and I’ll be sad to see it go; I’m thankful for the lessons I’ve learnt but now it’s all about 2020…
How we saw in the NY: in a tub full of bubbles, under the stars ✨
2020: bring it on…
2020, twenty-twenty. The new decade! And what a year I have planned! This will quite easily be the BEST year of my life. See below:
January – Speaking at BETT 2020 in London. For those of you that don’t know, BETT is the annual educational technology trade show, held at ExCel London, it receives over 34,000 visitors each year! I’ll be on stage sharing my journey using tech in the classroom!
March – AUSTRALIA! Need I say more? A week meeting fellow MIEExperts from all around the world, collaborating, sharing practice and hopefully, having lots of fun!
April – Viva Las Vegas. My beautiful best friend is getting married, so the only way we can celebrate is Vegas of course! 4 days in Sin City!
May – This is going to be a busy! I will turn 27, face another grueling week of Year 6 SATs, followed by watching my friend walk down the aisle. I cannot wait!
June – Hen do! Celebrating no longer being a Miss! I have absolutely no idea where or how or what! All I’ve been told is I need my passport eeek! Will keep you updated on this one!
August – Wedding month! No explanation needed!
So there’s just a few little reasons why I’m a little excited about this new year and why I need to seriously be shredding for the wedding in the gym. This little list is also a reminder that when insignificant things annoy me or I feel like I’m having a rubbish day I need to think back to the big picture and all of the incredible experiences pending and get over it. Feel it and let it go.
Happy 2020 everyone, don’t let the small-scale stuff get you down x
With the upcoming plethora of “my year on Instagram stories” and “chapter 1 of 12” new beginning rubbish, I thought I would actually see if there were any worthy mantras to inspire 2020 and make a mood of this new decade.
Trawling through Pinterest (for what felt like hours) couldn’t have left me more uninspired!! Who created these quotes????? Cliched, tacky and some just make me want to vom. But don’t worry, I’ve done that hard bit for you and hand picked 5 insta-worthy, non-sick inducing quotes to inspire your mood for this upcoming decade or let’s be real, use on you Instagram story…
1. Over it.
Honestly this resonates with me so much. Life is so short, we shouldn’t get wrapped up in tiny, insignificant grievances. If everyone believed the above and moved on wouldn’t the world be a happier place?
2. This.
My go to phrase (when dealing with playground arguments at work) is “everyone is entitled to feel how they want to feel” and it’s what I live by. Whether we totally agree or completely dispute something, we can’t tell someone else how to feel, we aren’t in their head and haven’t experienced their lives up into the very moment that makes them react in a specific way. We can all feel how we want, but we need to stop expecting others to understand how we feel. Likewise, we can’t apologise for unintentional actions. If someone is upset by a (non-malicious obviously) choice we have made that is on them, not on you – so don’t feel bad.
3. Bye Felicia
Hells yeh! I am hearing you sista! I am going to try seriously hard every day to eradicate these 5 toxicities above.
Trying to please everyone is unequivocally impossible – believe me, I’ve tried it. So let’s put ourselves first and work on our own self-love this year.
Change should be craved not feared!!! Without change we don’t grow or progress, change is literally my buzz word for 2020, with change comes opportunity and growth.
This one’s easy. If you don’t trust them, remove them from your circle.
Mood-Hoover repellent should be available in all large stores. Don’t let grumpy for no reason people bring you down. Positivity is a choice. When you focus on the good, the good gets better.
The past is the past for a reason, unless we let it go, we can’t move on. You can’t let the past destroy your future.
4. No Netflix, I am not still watching.
This one should be turned into a to do list. People are so quick to moan about life, but have they even tried to improve it? The above in isolation seem minuscule and perhaps a bit pointless, but together are life-changing. My first to tackle will be throwing away the clutter: mass clear out pending and then I’m going to try and show more gratitude to those that genuinely love and want the best for me, because they deserve it.
5. And my personal fave…
Does this need any explanation or analysis?? Education and knowledge (in my eyes) are invaluable and one of the most crucial traits a person can possess. This year I want to grow and develop professionally and smash my work-life goals, all whilst dressed best of course!
As I sit on the sofa, Hershel nestled on my lap, the rain is literally hammering at the windows, telling me to grab the chocolate and put a film on. It’s August. Great. Welcome to the British Summer! This time last year, myself and the husband to be, were exploring the city streets of Barcelona – one of our favourite cities. I am going to eventually finish my blog on brill places to visit, but for now, here’s 10 reasons as to why you should start planning a Barcelona trip right now!
1. It’s super close (to the UK).
The flight time is just over 2 hours from London. Barcelona is the second largest city in Spain and is cushioned in the North Eastern Mediterranean coast of mainland Spain. This being said, it means you can pick of flights really cheap, and when I say cheap I mean £30 return. I can’t even get to London (a 50 minute train journey) for less than that! If you aren’t close to London, don’t panic, as you can jump on a direct flight from: Manchester, Birmingham, Liverpool, Edinburgh, Nottingham, Leeds, Glasgow, Bristol, Newcastle, Cardiff, Belfast and Humberside.
2. City break + beach.
It encompasses city break vibes and the chill factor from a beach holiday. I always find myself scrawling with envy through the plethora of travel accounts that are literally globe-trotting to a new paradisal place. Now if like me, you can’t afford to visit a new country every other week, then you want to travel to somewhere that has lots to offer. Barcelona is a bumbling, busy city with chic rooftop bars and lively Las Ramblas streets to explore. It also has the most incredible architecture (everywhere), laid-back cafes for your afternoon coffee and miles of coastline. So regardless of how long your trip, you will never run out of things to do! Likewise, it’s certainly not a: “Oh I’ve been there before, so don’t fancy go back”.
3. Tapas. Everywhere.
This doesn’t really need an explanation. Barcelona is known for its informal, casual way of dining. Small plates of mediterranean cuisine, from patatas bravas to croquettes. You literally can’t walk a metre without seeing a tapas bar and there are billions of blogs listing the best tapas, but I’ll be honest, if you want tapas, there’s only one place to go: Carrer De Blai, or more commonly known as ‘The Street of Tapas’. This entire pedestrian street is full of Tapas bars either side, serving traditional Tapas menus. It’s not in the real touristy part of Barcelona, but obviously visited by many. There are metro stops close by (Poble-Sec or Paral-lel) or if you fancy a walk to burn some calories in anticiption of all that tapas, it’s a twenty-minute walk from the Las Ramblas area.
4. The Metro system.
Oh my god, it’s so easy, cheap and (for the most part) clean. Well cleaner than the Underground… An unlimited day ticket is around €15, we purchased the 4 day unlimited Hola ticket, which provided us with unlimited Metro travel for our entire trip and only cost €28.80. This was much cheaper than using busses, Ubers or taxis, and also much quicker. Maybe we were just unlucky, but whenever we actually wanted to taxi, there was always so much traffic! Not only is the Metro great for exploring Barcelona whilst you’re there, it’s also fab way of getting to and from the airport and all for only €4.20.
5. The weather is “just right”.
Sunny, warm and a nice breeze in the Summer. Not too hot that all you want to do is lay on a sun lounger whilst sweating profusely, but that mmm temperature where you don’t need a cardigan or jacket, even in the evening! We made sure our hotel had a rooftop pool, which was absolute heaven, so I would definitely say this is a necessity – especially if you’re like me and hate the beach!
5. Cocktails.
It’s always cocktail o’clock in my house, thanks to my very enthusiastic husband to be’s passion for perfecting recipes in the kitchen, but nothing beats a holiday cocktail. To be honest, I’m not sure I drank anything the entire 5 days that wasn’t cocktail related. And lucky for me, the cocktails were super reasonable so how could I resist? My favourite? A mix of watermelon, Prosecco and vodka from the effortlessly cool Salt Beach Club, Barcelona.
5. Gaudi.
Now I do not profess to being particularly knowledgable (or interested) in historical architects, but if you visit Barcelona, you can’t really avoid it. His beautiful buildings are everywhere (Tip: if you see any building with a crowd of people snapping on their iPhones, chance it’s a building designed by Guadi). Some of the must sees are Casa Milà,Casa BattlóandCasa Vicens, but it’s not just his buildings. Park Güellis absolutely incredible, but there is always a queue so booking in advance is a must, also, regardless of how you travel, there is a very steep walk up a lot of steps so we were totally pleased we chose to make a morning trip! And then obviously, there’s Sagrada Familia, arguably one of the most famous tourist spots in Barcelona. If you don’t visit this place, then technically you haven’t even been to Barcelona. It’s utterly breathtaking and well worth the paid entry to peak inside. This is definitely one of those moments to put down your phone and embrace the beauty and emotion within, instead of trying to get a photo for Insta!
Now let’s be honest, you’re thinking, “If she can only come up with 5 reasons, that’s not very promising…” or “She’s got bored of blog writing already!” But these 5 are pretty worthy and have surely tempted you a little to just look into Barcelona? In my very humble, insignificant opinion it is one of the best European cities out there, whether you’re going on a girly trip, with your boyf or even taking your kids – although that probably wouldn’t be as fun – you will never run out of things to do or tapas to eat, so it’s a win win!
When I get round to it, I will finish my other Barcelon-related blog which details all of the fab (Instagram friendly) places we visited! But for now, it’s tea + biscuits time!
First off, this wasn’t a blog I had on my “Blogs I want to write over the summer holidays” list. But sometimes in life (much to my dismay) not everything goes to plan. Now as much as it pains me to do something in the wrong order, I guess sometimes you just feel the urge to write about something specifically that simply resonates with you.
I have only told a few of my inner circle about my new-found blogging hobby (that no one reads), but like I’ve stated previously, I’m not writing for anyone else. I’m writing for me. Without sounding all airy-fairy, so far I have found my blogging experience to be totally and utterly cathartic. Instead of sitting, scrawling through social media posts for no other reason than to take my mind of insignificant worries, I’m putting my mind and time to good use and actually producing something. Not only do I have a piece of writing to show for it, but additionally I’ve spent a couple of hours totally engrossed with my current topic, meaning there is no brain-space for all of that worrying and over-thinking. So that’s what I’m going to do now. Instead of painstakingly mulling over a situation that is out of my control and stressing over every single potential scenario (that will never even happy anyway) I’m going to pick up my newly discovered bible, The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck, by the God that is Sarah Knight and search for some sagacity within, so if your inner-peace is spoilt by other people’s unwanted opinions please see below:
You Need to Stop Giving a F**k About What Other People Think – Page 25
This looks like a good place to start.
– “You have no control over what other people think.”
I mean, when you think about this, duhhh of course we don’t. But Sarah is so right. No matter how we think or behave, others will have their own opinions. It doesn’t matter how hard you try, there will always be people in life that you don’t share common beliefs with and others you simply will not get along with. It is futile and will just deplete the F**ks you have to give. So do you know what, let’s add these people to the “No longer give a F**k List” Goodbye. And good riddance.
You Do You – Page 187
This sounds like my sort of chapter.
– “You can take or leave my suggestions. This is meant to be aspirational and inspirational – not tyrannical.”
One person’s joy can be another person’s annoy. How right is that?? I totally agree but admittedly, I still can’t say I understand how anyone actually enjoys going to garden centres sing-along theatre shows… If this book has taught me anything, it’s that my F**ks are mine, and I can do what I see fit. If everyone just focused on their own F**ks rather than get up in other people’s the world would be a much happier place right? From now on, I’m doing me, and you should too. And next time people start poking around in my F**ks, I might just hand them this book…
F**k the Haters – Page 189
Now we’re talking. How perfectly pertinent.
– “You don’t have to be weighed down by their (the haters) narrow-mindedness or insecurity. Your life is great and getting better every day. F**k the haters.”Mind blown. Why is it that sometimes we just need to see written words in ink on paper to actually absorb and digest something? For as long as I can remember, I have let shitty opinions overwhelm mind, body and soul (I sound super dramatic I know) exhausting me emotionally and hindering me from actually giving time and energy to things in my life that I actually give a f**k about. Well no more! Without getting too dark, tomorrow you could fall from a rollercoaster, electrocute yourself in the bath or global warming might kill us all. We need to make every single second count. Seriously, those three little sentences are going to be my new mantra, my sacred utterance, I’d even have them tattooed if I was into that…
So there it is, a very off the cuff, emotion fuelled blog. The Worry Games, more commonly know as anxiety, are a set of games in which you don’t volunteer for, you are chosen at random. May the odds be ever in your favour. They’re also not often spoken about and certainly never given a prime time spot. One may think that if you ignore and try and play something different it will help you forget, and it might, but it doesn’t mean you’ve won your ticket of freedom from the arena. The Worry Games are something I have never talked about. But I don’t want to waste F**ks anymore, I’d like to win my shiny golden ticket, and the only way to do that is fight full on. Starting with writing a blog. Will it work? Who knows? But do I feel better? Absolutely.
WARNING – This is a long one. And for anyone that is not remotely interested in cosmetic dentistry or teeth, a very boring one too. You’ve been warned so if you choose to read on, don’t moan.
Very recently I revealed to my very humble Instagram following my brand new “Hollywood Smile”. Now I’ve had this conversation with many people before: why do people feel the need to change what their mama gave them? Well my answer is always the same. If it makes you feel better and mentally, you are in a happy healthy state then why the f**k can’t you do what you want with YOUR body?
Now like I’ve mentioned before, there are numerous things I would eagerly change about myself but ultimately, I’m a teacher and if you didn’t already know, teachers certainly don’t teach for the pay. So you have to prioritise your woes into the things that actually bother you enough to change and the things you just have to learn to live with. My example: my crooked toes are now just a part of me, I think they give me extra grip when pivoting in a game of netball, however my teeth – they’re pretty major and there’s a million and one things I could do to them.
If you’re an avid Instagram fan then you expect to see nothing but perfect pearly whites on your feed. Every semi-famous influencer or ex-Love Islander is now the proud owner of veneers; why can’t I have perfect teeth too? Is it any wonder, even with monetary incentives I would absolutely refuse to smile with teeth. And there is nothing worse than being genuinely overjoyed, say at a special occasion, a wedding, the arrival of a new bundle of joy and you have to try and smile with your mouth closed? So when it dawned on me, that all of these people weren’t naturally born with gleaming gnashers, no they’d enhanced their teeth one way or another. The thing was, I didn’t know anyone that had “had their teeth done”. I’d seen the plethora of posts from z-list celebrities, hashtag AD, recommending the best dentists, but they obviously don’t mention that they’ve had their sparkly new veneers completed free of charge in return for their social media post… So how could I believe them? Where could I get an honest account and experience review? Well I searched and couldn’t find one, so I’ll be honest, I was literally shitting myself on the eve of NewTeeth Day.
Also, and I HAVE to add this is, because there is now way I can write a blog about cosmetic dentistry in the 21st century and not speak briefly about Teeth from Turkey. For the record, I am absolutely not stating that dentists in Turkey (or any other European country) are not skilled or produce great results. I am just addressing a prevalent topic within our current society. This so-called dental tourism is clearly of interest for many of us Brits, and with claims that cosmetic dentistry procedures are around 70% cheaper in countries like Turkey compared with the UK is it any wonder our society is intrigued? To justify my point here, according to Google Trends, there was a 100% leap in the searches for ‘veneers Turkey’ prior to last year’s Love Island launching and the day when Jack Fincham (one half of the winning 2018 couple) spoke about his “teeth from Turkey”. Now because this is a blog, I am allowed to share my sincere, plain-spoken opinion. If you asked if I would have work completed on my teeth in Turkey, my answer would be no. I am sure that many people out there have had brilliant, dazzling experiences with dentists in Turkey and flown back to the UK literally on Cloud 9. Hey, they’ve probably topped up their tan and saved themselves a fortune, but for every person that has experienced the dental dream, there are an abundance of less-fortunate plagued with terrifying teeth memoirs. A simple Google search just scratches the surface of the true terror that could meet you, if you decided to find your (hopefully) perfect smile in Turkey. Quite simply, costs are lowers because standards are too. Anyway, enough on that matter – you can make your mind up.
So below, is a little insight into my New Teeth, New Me Journey.
Step 1 – The Motivation
Like I’ve said previously, I’m constantly identifying things I want to change and improve. Now when I got engaged, my first thought was f**k this is really happening, but immediately after that my brain started pinging thoughts of dread. The photos! How do you smile without showing teeth on THE HAPPIEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE? The Videographer! How do I explain to her (whilst trying to sound sane and not vain) that I don’t want open mouth shots? Guest cameras! The one day I’ll truly know how it feels to have paparazzi following my every move, certainly no time for a quick selfie that day. How do I police the hundreds of photos that will be posted? I did warn you in a previous blog that I’m an over-thinker. But now you will have a sense of the issue my less than perfect stubby teeth were giving me. Truthfully, my teeth really weren’t totally awful. Not white? Yes. But they were straight and generally unnoticeable. But that’s the problem, I wanted a winning smile for my wedding day and that’s what I set out to get.
Step 2 – Research
Instagram is honestly one of my biggest hate-loves in the world. One one hand, I am completely cynical about the Insta-World we now live in and feel like scrawling through my feed is just an adult version of the Argos catalogue. I’m not actually looking at creative content, merely sifting through ad after edited ad, and then clever part? I don’t even realise I’m dedicating 2 hours a day to look at clothes I don’t need and holiday destinations I can’t afford. And the other hand? I bloody love it. I think it would be fair to say I have totally fallen for the Instagram conventions and conform to be the basic Instagrammer. Now despite the constant mental battle relay in my head, Instagram is useful for research. Please enter the useful tool that is the Hashtag Search. I searched and searched for different dentists, with brilliant reviews – no wait, I’ll be honest, a huge following. I looked at so many before and after photos I was literally dreaming about sickeningly perfect teeth in my sleep, however I started to realise that dentistry procedures aren’t a one size fits all, and the results of said procedure vary from dentist to dentist. After months of following ‘#teethtransformation and #cosmeticdentistry’ on the gram I was absolutely certain I wanted to go forward and book a consultation and I had decided exactly where I was going to go: Maison Dental. It’s also worth mentioning that a friend of a friend had been to see Dr Alex, the most fashionable dentist you will ever meet, and had a first-hand recommendation for me.
Now if you’re reading this and feel my words have persuaded you already, sorry to disappoint but you need to hold your horses because unless there’s a wave of cancellations, you won’t be showing off your new gnashers any time soon. I enquired on the 25th of March and the first consultation appointment Dr Alex had in the London practice was the 27th of July. I’m pretty sure I responded with something along the lines of “Wow you are super busy!” But this was honestly another factor that supported my confidence in knowing I had picked the right dentist. Maison Dental are busy. They’re busy because they are good at what they do. If you truly care about perfect teeth, you will be patient. But look on the bright side, if you aren’t imprisoned in a Monday to Friday job with no options for days off in term-time like mine, then you can probably get a midweek appointment much quicker.
Step 3 – Consultation
Maison Dental are based in London, Manchester and Leeds. The latter being their flagship practice, complete with chic decor, worthy of any Instagram feed. I slid into the DMs of Maison Dental and was met with a friendly, swift response. They don’t waste anytime, it was explained to me that to determine the best course of treatment I would need to be seen for a consultation appointment. If I wanted Dr Shaf or Dr Richard, the fee was £50 and if I wanted to see the Dr Alex, the practice owner I mentioned earlier it was to be £100. I was assured that any consultation fee is credited towards the treatment if I chose to proceed.
Now for some people £100 isn’t a lot of money, but let me tell you, when you are planning a wedding, every time you spend anything, you equate it to how many wedding favours that would buy (wedding favours that are extremely pointless and always get left behind…) so my advice to anyone interested in going down this route is anticipate costs and make sure you are sure. The whole purpose of the consultation was to determine the course of treatment. Now I’m no dentist, but I knew I’d be looking at something along the lines of composite edge bonding or composite veneers plus a little teeth whitening. So I already had a range of costs calculated in my head. There is no god paying a consultation fee and then deciding it’s too expensive. If you do that, you’ve wasted a trip and £100 you could have spent on something else (hopefully that’s less pointless than wedding favours).
Consultation day arrived so myself and my not so little brother hopped on the train the Leeds. In hindsight, driving potentially would be easier due to the location of the practice, but a 20 minute trip out of the city in a friendly Uber was more than manageable. No my brother didn’t accompany me for fun, he would definitely admit he is far too selfish to do something like that, he intrigued by my new teeth journey decided he wanted to perfect his too. Upon arrival, we were greeted by the friendly receptionists of offered us perfectly chilled Smart Water or a selection of hot drinks. Since visiting, a new drinks menu has been released and I hear the Alexcinno is a must try! If we weren’t in such a rush (traffic was such a ball-ache), I certainly would have forced my un-cooperating brother into taking a photo for the gram but time did not allow. Seriously though, you have never seen a dentist practice like it – you would think Élan Café have branched out to Leeds, it is pretty special.
With regards to the actual consultation, mine was pretty simple – composite edge bonding* was out of the question, the most suitable option to achieve the perfect smile of my dreams was to go for composite veneers. Composite veneers involve sculpting translucent composite resin directly onto the teeth; a much less invasive way of perfecting a smile and a much less expensive alternative to porcelain veneers. Now remember, I said that the resin “stuff” they apply to your teeth is translucent and therefore if you are looking to achieve a bright-white smile, you will also need to add on a bout of teeth whitening.
Within the 30 minute consultation I was presented Dr Alex’s suggestion of treatment as well as the cost of said treatment and finance options. I decided on teeth whitening and then 6 composite veneers to my upper teeth. I had the choice to proceed with Dr Alex who charges £500 a tooth or one of his associates at a rate of £400 a tooth. I didn’t feel I could make this decision at the time, so asked for quotes for both options and went away to mull over the pennies in my head.
Although it’s not about him, in case you’re wondering my brother’s only option was to go for Invisalign. Due to his teeth not being straight, there is nothing that could be done until that issue was fixed. Invisalign uses advanced 3D computer-imaging technology to capture images of your current teeth situation and create images of what your teeth, if you strictly follow the Invisalign method, could be. Aligners are then made and need to be worn for around two-weeks. With each set being slightly different, gradually changing towards your desired result. It’s a commitment and a flipping expensive one at that, but honestly, just google the before and afters – one word: amazing!
Step 4 – Teeth Whitening
Now before I share my teeth whitening experience, let’s just discuss all of the different fads out there – I just have to get it off my chest. I do not understand for the life of me why people continue to fall for these absolute cons in the form of whitening strips or charcoal toothpaste!!!!! ALL OF THE Z-LISTERS THAT ADVERTISE THESE PRODUCTS HAVE THEIR TEETH PROFESSIONALLY WHITENED – MOST OF THEM HAVE VENEERS!!! So save your money and invest in it properly or don’t bother at all.
For my teeth-whitening part of the procedure, I booked into the London practice – located in Holborn literally a 4 minute walk from the tube station. Now don’t get disheartened upon entering when you realise there’s no flower wall or pink velvet sofa. The dentists work from this practice at the weekend from what I understand so it’s simply a standard dentist practice – a nice one – but nonetheless, a dentist practice. But let’s get real here, does that actually matter? The dentist that carried out my teeth whitening was oh so friendly and put me at ease. Like I said, I’d tried to research, but there really wasn’t much out there on what to expect. I knew there would be a mouth guard, a laser?? and some form of gel, but that’s about as far my understanding went. Also, it’s important to note, but admittedly, I was hungover. Very hungover and spent the majority of my train journey convincing myself I was going to throw up. I wasn’t and I didn’t but you know that over-thinking thing again? Yep, the bane of my life.
In-between my little hungover snooze.
First up was a quick clean and polish on my poor little teeth. The dentist commended me on good dental hygiene and other than the obvious aesthetic issue I had going on, they were in pretty good condition. Gold star for me. Now it was time for the actual whitening part. I’ll be honest the hardest part about all of this is the mouth guard that is thrust into your mouth, holding your gums and lips in a less than comfortable position. It was then 4 rounds of whitening. Gel on the teeth, laser on for 15 minutes, wipe gel off, add more gel and repeat. I’ll be honest, I was quite grateful for my hungover state, as it allowed me to sleep through some of it, so when people ask about pain, there literally wasn’t any. By round 2, it would be fair to say I was clock watching, more so because of the weird discomfort I felt from the gummy mouth contraption not because it was unbearable. Before I knew it, time was up, I was ready to see my shiny white teeth gleaming in the mirror. And it’s fair to say, that dream very quickly dissolved. My teeth had changed yes, but not to the extent you dream about, however
I knew that this was just the beginning and not my end result…
After the in-house whitening laser/gel procedure, it was time to talk about the next step – the at-home whitening. I had little plastic trays made – these were like the little gum shields I had to wear at the age of 8, when I dabbled in rugby as a defiant self-proclaimed tomboy. These trays were to be filled with the whitening gel and then worn for two hours each day for a total of 6 consecutive days. I was warned that I could experience a little teeth sensitivity, but the best way to combat that would be to fill the trays with toothpaste for sensitive teeth, this sounded way too messy to me; I’d just knock back a few paracetamols.
I left the dentist slightly deflated, I didn’t have a Hollywood Smile (yet) but with my little Philips Zoom bag in hand, I was determined to commit to achieve the best results. That brings me to the White Diet. I’ll be honest, this was probably the hardest bit – shock it’s because it involves food. Turns out, anything that is white/beige isn’t particularly healthy. I did have a google for inspiration, but like I’ve mentioned I’m not particularly interested in the culinary world, as long as it fits into my calorie allowance and provides the appropriate nutrients to keep me alive – I’ll eat it. *Goes to Tesco and purchases six Healthy Living Carbonara ready meals* The hardest thing to give up was without a doubt tea and coffee. I don’t believe any teacher out there can work without caffeine – especially considering term was drawing to a close. You try to contain 30 pre-pubescent Year 6 children in 30 degree heat on the last week of term, go on I dare you. In addition to dark foods and drinks, it was advised to avoid eating or drinking anything that is highly acidic: fruits, fizzy drinks and fruit juices for example. You also can’t smoke, but let’s be honest, no one should be smoking in this day and age, so if you do, get your teeth whitened because it might help you kick that habit altogether!
Anyway, after 6 days of following the whitening rules to the tee (I am a stickler for a good rule) I was absolutely over the moon with my result. Before any procedure, you have to sign a form agreeing and consenting to the fact that results vary. They certainly do, but I now am proof that when followed correctly it does work. Oh and also, literally no sensitivity issues, just two hours of feeling a bit salivary and not being able to eat.
1. Before 2. Day 4 3. Final result after whitening
Step 5 – The Procedure
Two weeks after my teeth whitening appointment I was back again for my new teeth. Excited was an understatement, but being the over analyser I am, admittedly as I sat on my 7am LNER Azuma train (without my usual skinny vanilla latte made with oat milk Starbucks order) doubts pinged in my mind. I’d wanted this for soooooo long. But it was going to be a big change. Bigger than I first thought.
As I divulged earlier, there was a monetary difference depending on which Doctor you selected. After mulling over my options, I chose Dr Richard. I reached this conclusion by becoming an absolute Instagram stalker. I simply looked at all of the existing cases Dr Richard had carried out on the Maison Dental Instagram feed and asked myself – did they look good? Would I be happy with those teeth? And my answer: hell yeh! Dr Richard is brilliant at what he does and as much as I loved Dr Alex, I had to remind myself I’m saving for a wedding and every little helps! Regardless of who you choose, you’ll be blown away with the results, so it’s totally your own personal decision based on your budget.
Dr Richard and his dental assistant were lovely! They put me at ease and explained the procedure. The procedure took around 4 hours; each tooth was worked on individually with the middle two taking longer as they set the tone for the rest. Hello my old friend Mr Mouthguard. I’ll be honest, it’s just not comfortable to wear a mouthguard but apart from the discomfort of that, there is literally no pain. No filing down, no drilling, no teeth shaving. The only way I can explain it (and I’m warning you this is not a scientific, accurate explanation) is comparing it to having acrylic nails!!! I could feel the composite going on and then it would be moulded, then set with a little blue laser contraption. Dr Richard would keep adding and sculpting until he was happy. After what felt like forever, I was ready for the big reveal. Dr Richard warned me it was a big change and oh boy was it…
Step 6 – The Results
This isn’t the part where I tell you I jumped for joy and cried tears of sheer happiness at the sight of my new Hollywood Smile. This is where I give you the honest, unfiltered truth. I genuinely didn’t recognise this person smiling back at me. My whole face had changed. Whose teeth were these?? Because they certainly weren’t mine. I uttered out something like: wow yeh a big change. I couldn’t even say I loved them or think of an adjective. After liking millions of teeth transformations I finally had my very own and I didn’t know how to digest it. I literally ran out of the dentist, in order to make sure I didn’t miss my train. I then spent the next 51 minutes contemplating if I’d made a mistake. Were they too perfect? Too white? Too different? Too much of a change? To make me feel better, I tried to sneak a few selfies, trialling different smiles: teethy smiles, smiles with tongue showing, huge smiles, little smiles. I mean, I’ve spent 26 years displaying the same mouth closed smile – I needed the practice. Alongside sneaky selfie practice, I tried to eat a cereal bar. Granted a nut based, crunchy cereal bar perhaps wasn’t the ideal snack to try and eat with my new gnashers. Let’s just say, in the week that followed I felt much more confident with side chewing then taking big old front on bites.
So not only did I look like I had someone else’s teeth in my mouth, it also felt that way. You under estimate the extent of how you would notice even the slightest change of something foreign in your mouth. I could just feel them. I guess, when you’ve spent the majority of your life with the same adult teeth, it should feel different – but again, I hadn’t really thought about the physical feel. I’m really hoping I haven’t put you off, and I hope you’ve stayed with me this long to not give up now. Because after the initial shock had faded, I realised how much I loved them. I had finally achieved what I desired most: a perfect smile I was proud to show. It had taken myself and my teeth a few days to get to know each other, but during this time we managed to work together to chew food conventionally and they began to feel at home within my mouth. It’s also worth noting that my closest inner circle loved the train-selfies I had sent them which helped me feel confident enough to share one on my Instagram feed. Since the procedure I’m brushing on average around 4 times a day (it’s a bit of an obsession really) and trying to avoid unnecessary consumption of teeth staining foods. And when I obviously cave in to my daily latte, I just make sure I drink through a straw.
Just so I’ve shared all of the facts, I will be going back to see Dr Richard in September for my follow-up appointment. Having this appointment allows me to get used to the new pearly whites, identify anything I want changing or amend. So far there isn’t really anything I want changing, I’m more interested in having two more teeth completed… but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
Hopefully this long-winded, sincere blog has helped you to better understand the procedure that is composite veneers. Maybe it will persuade you to look into it? Possibly it will give you the little nudge to go ahead and book a consultation if you, like me have been pining over new teeth. Or let’s be honest, you might think you’ve wasted your life reading a blog about an absolute first world problem, but hey, we’re all different.
Before Day 3 Day 6
To recap here are my top tips:
See, I wasn’t lying about the sneaky train selfies.
1. Choose the right dentist for you: look at their portfolio and remember, you get what you pay for.
2. Follow the rules. If you’re told to avoid red wine + coffee, avoid it. You are in control of your results. C’mon it’s literally a week.
3. Brush. Floss. Brush. Repeat.
4. Prepare yourself for the shock factor – something I didn’t do. So learn from my mistake to avoid the awful anxious feeling of regret I suffered from in the immediate aftermath.
5. Thank your dentist. Dr Richard, if ever you read this I am so sorry I couldn’t articulate how much I loved them. You literally
gave me the smile of dreams, so thank you so much!
6. Practice those smiles ladies and gentlemen, work out how to flash your new smile.
What happens if unlike the majority of the female population, you hate wedding dresses? It’s not that I don’t wear dresses, I certainly do, but for me, lots of the dresses I had seen were very traditional, bridey wedding dresses. Yeh, I get that’s the point but as much as I tried I just didn’t like anything. I think as well, when you are a self-confessed over thinker, who shrieks with dread at the phrase “We’ll just see what happens…” you don’t believe in that mythical dress feeling that brides claim to get. I’m a head over heart type of girl, so there’s no way I’d be crying Yes if I hadn’t already mentally weighed up all of the pros and cons. Anyway, after around 50 dresses, 6 bridal boutiques, and over 1000 saved photos on Instagram, I found The One. Below are some of the lessons I learnt along the way.
1. Get naked
Let’s just get this one out of the way. You spend most of your time in a fitting room in hopefully appropriate pants, boobs out Adam and Eve style. I guarantee you begin by completing a little naked shuffle, trying to hide your modestly whilst being helped into a very expensive dress. Another point to add here is the undies situation. Wedding dresses are made to be worn without bras. It doesn’t matter if your multi-bra promises to be worn unseen, it’s not going to work so embrace the nipple and lose the bra. Now let’s talk about pants. My recommendation is nude, seam-free Spanx style. Simple, inoffensive and they hold in that unwanted belly. However, undies aside, let’s be realistic here ladies. This lovely lady, who is currently on her knees helping me put my leg through the correct hole, as she supports my nearly-naked body weight, is used to this and does this all day long. Cliche, but she’s seen it all before and you are no exception. So don’t stress about your unclothed, unfiltered body and enjoy the moment; we’re only going to do it once, well hopefully…
2. Leave the fake tan at home
Most bridal boutiques have unwritten (and more commonly now actually written) rules, which they disguise as tips for perspective dress shopping brides. Unlike the perfectly presented brides to be on Say Yes to the Dress, make up or fake tan is a bit of a grey zone. Understandably, some of the dresses you’ll be trying on are seriously expensive, and the last thing you want to do is suffer the embarrassing incident of leaving an orangey stain on the delicate, perfectly-white crepe fabric. Coming from a lifetime member of the fake tan club, this was hard. It is rare I don’t wear tan, but my underlying thought was that if I could fall in love with a dress looking my pale, freckly self, how much more would I like it, when bronzed and made up? So save yourself a laborious evening of tanning and embrace the pale.
3. Choose your entourage wisely
In all the films and trashy reality tv shows, the bride partakes in dress shopping with her entire bridal party, listening to all of the conflicting opinions, waiting for the agreed consensus of yes – that’s the one. However, in my own experience of being an honoured bridal party member this was not the case. I wasn’t involved in a single aspect of the all-important dress shopping. I was confused, I thought that’s what my job was. Not only was I not involved, I wasn’t even allowed to peak at the mysterious gown. But that’s not what happens on the TV? Fast forward 2 years to embarking on my own dress buying journey and I totally get it. Instead of it turning into a big day out, I chose to just take my Mum. WARNING – just remember with sweet little ladies like my Mum, they think everything is beautiful, so she wasn’t much help in figuring out what I wanted, but it was a truly heart-warming experience I got to share just with her, that we’ll remember forever. After I had selected my dress (so my opinion/decision could not be swayed), I then invited my mother-in-law (we have a very unconventional super-close relationship) and my Maid of Honour to see me in it. Let’s be honest, if I wouldn’t have shown the two of them, it wouldn’t be to long before my drunken, blabbermouth self would have ended up showing them a rubbish picture off the internet. That leads me to number 4 – photos.
4. For once in your life, put your camera down!
In a world obsessed with capturing our every moment, because let’s be real, if we didn’t get a photo, did it even happen? So don’t freak out when you’re told not to take photos. The bridal boutique owners will tell you it’s because of lighting and the fact that the photo won’t actually capture the dress, but honestly a lot of it comes down to the worry of copying designs. So it turns out, and I promise you this is the truth, that some savvy brides-to-be actually have the balls to spend time sipping champers, trying on dresses, illusively saying Yes, whilst all the time they are actually gathering ideas to take to a dressmaker to whip up for a fraction of the cost. So yeh, I understand why they say no to photos. Also, the first photo in my dress needs to be on my wedding day – not a photo of me pale and awkward in the changing room. Also, referring to my confession in Point 3, if I had a photo of me in it, my not sober self, would definitely flash it around at the next bottomless brunch!
5. Avoid unrealistic Instagram and Pinterest Brides!
A lot of the stunning images you see on Pinterest are custom made and not to mention probably out of price range. You can’t just walk into a bridal shop an say: “This is the dress I wish to try on.” Yes I’m all for a little inspiration and I found saving photos to be a great method in discovering what I actually wanted from a dress, but you still need to be realistic. Likewise, to avoid that dreaded sense of the grass is greener, as soon as I had found my dress, I immediately proceeded to unfollow all of the different wedding dress accounts I was following. Goodbye saved collection on Instagram and #AlternativeWeddingDresses hashtag. I almost felt like it would be cheating on my dress! I have a dress, so why would I be looking and like others?
6. Try on everything and trust your bridal advisor
I didn’t necessarily know what I wanted, but I could unequivocally articulate everything I didn’t want: no lace, no sleeves, no short dresses, no puffiness, nothing strapless, no crystals and absolutely no princess gowns. I’ll be honest, I was forced into a “Princess Dress” more for comical value than anything else and all it did was confirm my dislike for that style of dress ON ME. But there were other shapes and styles that I wouldn’t have naturally chosen. You might just be surprised – I was. Not only this, but if you go to a legitimate bridal shop, chances are they’ll give you great suggestions based on your articulation of your vision. I ended up picking the one dress recommended by the ultra-cool owner of Halo & Wren, Jemma, meaning she has earned the title of my very own fairy godmother. She totally got my vibe and after trying on all of my initial choices (and much to my dismay, my Mum’s) I tried on hers and it was literally a combination of shock and love at first sight. She did what I couldn’t do, but is it any surprise? It is her job after all. Want to know more about this wedding dress wizard? Read about a day in her life.
7. Does designer matter?
Now this one is totally dependent on the sort of bride you are. For me, designer was always going to be the answer. Fashion is something I like to think I follow and important in my day to day life. I would never have said no to a dress because it wasn’t designer, but it just seemed to be that everything I demonstrated an interest in was designer. With regards to designer dresses, if it’s a specific dress you fall in love with on social media, you need to do your research. Often designers only stock in exclusive shops, in certain countries. You also need to consider the cost. Many of the bridal shops I visited had an appointment fee – obviously this comes off your dress IF you purchase, but something to bear in mind if you have a catalogue of places to visit. On the other hand, I visited bridal shops that literally didn’t contain a single dress I even wanted to try on There are millions of dresses out there, with a million different price tags to go with them. I think budget has to be factored in, but ultimately, designer or not, it’s how the dress makes you feel (corny I know).
8. Not everyone cries!
To refute the TV shows and movies, not every bride-to-be will cry and that’s okay. We all have different ways of illustrating emotion, some of us might cry, some of us may give nothing away at all. If you are a self-proclaimed rational over-thinker like myself, crying was never going to be on the cards. I’ll be honest though, The One for me definitely made me feel something I can’t quite express with words. You’ll definitely get the feeling, but I genuinely believe it’s different for each and every one of us.
9. Have fun and drink the free bubbly!
Can I get you a refreshment? You answer yes. Chances are you’ll have that little butterfly feeling of nerves mixed with excitement, so bubbles will definitely help that. Whether or not it’s your first or third marriage it is still an equally important occasion, so most importantly, you want to enjoy the experience! So look forward to it, drink the free bubbly and have fun. It’s your turn to steal that limelight and enjoy the attention.
10. Anticipate the boring bits
Sorry to end with this rubbish point, but technically this is where it lies in the whole finding the one process. Regardless of what it says on the price tag, you need to factor in alteration costs and time constraints they will require. This may also mean added return trips to said bridal store to ensure it is right. As lovely as your experience should be, you still have to address
the less than magical paperwork part and deposit discussion.
Bridal Boutiques I visited:
The Wedding Club, South Kensington
What I loved?
So easy to get to, right next to South Kensington Tube Station. Instagrammable decor, bubbles on arrival and a range of designers and accompanying price tags.
They are the only bridal boutique in the UK to stock the incredibly beautiful Rime Arodaky dresses amongst a range of other exclusive French designers. The Arodaky dresses are literally breath-taking and their flagship boutique, close to the famous Portobello Road, is an Instagram lover’s dream, combining fashion with detail.
Jemma, the owner is incredible, she opened the boutique after her own struggles finding a wedding dress for the not so mainstream bride. The boutique itself is BEAutiful and effortlessly cool. H&W is perfect for the modern bride who wants something a little different.
Designers?
Jane Hill, Emmy-Mae, Rembo, Aleena Leena Bridal, Willowby by Watters and many more!
So here it is folks the reason behind my blog and the inspiration for the new, less anxious, more relaxed version of myself.
Let’s start from the beginning…
I love writing, not because I’m particularly skilled or creative, but I just like to write. In a society consumed with appearance, words and meaning often get lost – they come second. I mean, when you visit a tourist spot, all everyone is interested in doing is getting the photo for the gram, we don’t live for the moment, absorb the atmosphere, enjoy the company of our companions. Instead we insist on spending time trying to capture the moment and turn all of those potential emotions into a little square for people (who aren’t in your actual life) to click a heart. The sad irony is, in order to get that perfected picture, you’re not actually then fully allowing yourself to just enjoy the moment. Anyway, I digress (I do this a lot) my point is that I like to write. Just because. And words are still important.
Despite my fondness of writing, I couldn’t possibly start a blog! I’m not a blogger, I don’t have a degree in English Literature, I don’t own a library card, I don’t follow many blogs and certainly couldn’t give you a list of recommendations (yet) on blogs to follow, I’m reading this all back and definitely talking myself out of even continuing to write, but this is all relevant. Regardless of the sense of satisfaction I feel from putting fingers to keys, I would never in a million years have digitally published anything into the internet world because, and this essentially is the crux of all my issues in life – I care too much about what others think. And I’m not talking about people thinking my blog is boring and irrelevant or so late to the party (all of which are valid opinions) I was worried that no one would even bother to read it. At least if someone throws shade at your shitty, amateur attempt at a blog they’ve actually read it and taken their time to form an opinion. And that’s where the wisdom of Sarah Knight comes in. I needed to learn to not give a f**k. For the record, I’ve never ever owned a book with the F word in to that extent. Admittedly, it took me about six chapters to actually read the word f**k in my head rather than say beep.
The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F**k is ultimately what it says on the cover. Now, not everyone will technically or morally agree with some of Sarah’s suggestions, but like she points out, if that’s how you feel, you need to stop what you’re doing and immediately proceed straight to page 25: “You Need To Stop Giving a F**k About What Other People Think.” Follow this little bread crumb and you are well on your way to becoming enlightened in the practice of not giving a f**k! Now just to be clear, the idea isn’t that we become an asshole and sack everything and everyone off in our life that causes us a little stress from time to time, no there is no excuse for that. That’s just being an asshole. The point is to self-prioritise the f**ks we have to give in order to make us happier, healthier people.
So here it goes. I shall share with you my new-found wisdom. The original f**ks I used to give and now the actual f**ks (I want to give) that I’m going to replace them with:
1. Raw-feeding my dog ——————> Actually taking him out for walks
I mean, really? I adore my little 4-legged Hershel with all of my heart and obviously want the best for him, but mashing up raw mince and egg yolks twice a day – naa you’re alright thank you. I can’t even begin to imagine the consequence of that diet on his bowel movements, nor the effect this would have on me when cleaning up the end result of said bowel movements. So, stuff you Gill from Miniature Dachshunds UK – no I won’t give into peer pressure and proceed to give Hershey a raw chicken wing for a treat – Lily’s Kitchen will do just fine. Read Point 9 for more on Gill. So what f**k am I going to give? I’m going to allocate more time for walking my sausage, rather than leaving it to my husband to me, I mean he’s just so good at dog walking… no I’m going to do it – dog walking is my new thing.
Gill would also be having an absolute bitch fit if she saw Hershel drinking a Puppacinno, but guess what Gill? I know longer give a f**K!
2. Gardening ——————> Netflix
If you ever met my delightful mother bear, you would not think she gave birth to me. She is the ultimate stay at home mum. Needlework? Let me just sew you a dress! Cooking? Not a problem – let me just whip you up a little homemade meal: roast leg of milk-fed Pyrenean mountain lamb, accompanied with foraged, golden carrot batons, finished with a rose-scented foam. No I’m kidding, but boy can my mum cook! And gardening? When it comes to gardening, just call her Alan Titchmarsh. If I was her neighbour I would install wooden shutters to block out the impressive view that fills me with envy every time I visit. But gardening for me is just pointless. You spend 2 hours weeding, 48 hours later and a couple of rain showers, BOOM all the weeds are back! So instead of constantly worrying about what my neighbours (who I literally give no f**ks about) think of my pathetic square of a garden, I’m going to catch up on all the Netflix series on my to do list.
3. Going out to less than average restaurants ——————> Shitty takeaway food
Okay, so I’ll share more about this on a future blog post, but I am a food-lover at heart. Happy? EAT. Sad? EAT. Worried? Eat. Nervous? Eat. Excited? Eat. You get my drift. But over the last couple of years, I’ve been on a slow-paced weight loss journey, so now I genuinely appreciate food (because I live off tuna and cucumber all week – ewwww). So when my friends ask to go to an overpriced, mediocre chain restaurant, I’m filled with dread. It sounds selfish, but if you read the book you will understand, I need to say no to calorific, school dinner like food and spend my cheat meal calories on what I actually want. A big fat Chinese.
4. Manicures + Pedicures ——————> Pearly Whites
Everyone has something about themselves they hate. Or if you’re like me, thanks to the impractical world of social media perfectness, I have quite a few things. Well anyway, one of them is my toes. They are ugly, crooked little stubs that don’t ever like to fit in cute shoes. But it’s dawned on me that spending £40 on a gel french manicure every 4 weeks isn’t going to make them look any better. Likewise, I play netball, I can’t have long nails – so I just need to embrace the natural little sausage fingers I have and not waste money trying to make them look more Instagram friendly and for the record, how unrealistic are long, stiletto shaped nails anyway? Not to mention a health and safety hazard. And more to the point, is getting my nails done a pleasant experience? About as pleasant as being stuck in M25 rush hour traffic on the way to the airport. You can’t book an appointment, so end up wasting that oh so precious time sitting in an incorrectly placed chair, avoiding the well-fingered, out dated magazines and when you are finally invited to the “chair of nail dreams”, you get to spend roughly 90 minutes, in silence, listening to your nail technician have a conversation with their nail neighbour in a totally different language, probably laughing about my sausage-shaped phalanges. So now I’ve let go of that old-existing f**k, what have I replaced it with? My new pearly whites. My time and money is now feeding into my shiny new, perfect Hollywood teeth, courtesy of Maison Dental. This is something I give a whole-hearted f**k too, but more about that in the future…
5. Fad diets ——————> My Fitness Pal
As I previously mentioned, I am a life-long member of the over-eating club. You name it, I’ve tried it: Cabbage Diet, Maple Syrup Diet, Weight Watchers, Slimming World, Intermittent Fasting and the Just Not Eating Diet (lol). But did any of them work? And I don’t just mean did I lose weight? Because if that was the question, then the answer would undoubtedly be Yes. Of course you’ll lose weight if you just drink maple syrup, mixed with hot water and cayenne pepper for 10 days. But weight loss and fitness isn’t just physical, it’s mental too. I’ve since ditched all of the above and simply track my calories on My Fitness Pal. No “free foods”, I mean whose stupid idea was that – nothing in life is free!! No points or syns, how on earth can you tell me a chunky KitKat is a syn – it is a treat that has blessed our planet! All I do is track what I eat, ensuring I stay under my calorie target for the day. Have I lost weight? Yes. And the big one now: am I happy? Yes. Do I feel sinful and ashamed when I eat a chunky KitKat? Absolutely bloody not.
6. Theatre Shows ——————> Football
I’m sorry, really sorry, but anything that involves signing and (bad) acting, it’s a nope from me. I refuse to pretend to enjoy visiting the theatre or live shows. No I don’t want to watch and I certainly won’t be singing along. And oh god! Audience participation! I have nightmares about unwanted invitations to make a knob of myself in front of a room of strangers. Football on the other hand, I love. What’s there not to like? A pint, a hotdog and an actual purposeful performance. The adrenaline of watching your team on the ball, the sheer joy when your team score and the special sense of togetherness when you’re in a crowd of 60,000 people all chanting and cheering. So yeh, no more West End Shows (no matter how many people recommend them) and more football games this season.
7. Beyonce ——————> Developing my own understanding of Politics
Now with this one, I’m well aware I’m going to lose a significant proportion of the population. But it is what it is, I’m not a fan of Queen Bey and certainly don’t identify as a member of the BeyHive. Instead of pretending I like her and trying to learn song lyrics so I’m not the odd one out, instead I could do with some more time developing my own understanding of the chaotic mess that is politics in the United Kingdom. And to be fair, I need to read up on American politics too. So far I base my understanding of the political system on Designated Survivor and Scandal – oh how I’d love to visit the Oval Office! Don’t get me wrong, I don’t live under a rock, I know snippets, but there’s nothing worse than someone who digitally throws their unjustified opinions around without actually having an adequate amount of understanding on the subject. Likewise, I can’t confront these annoying opinionated keyboard warriors, unless I too know what I’m talking about.
8. Beetroot lattes ——————> Any other hot drink that doesn’t taste like mud
It’s in the name. They look good, they taste like shit. I’m going to stick with my usual skinny vanilla latte (hot or iced depending on the weather) made with Oat milk.
9. Odd Numbers ——————> Learning how to use my coffee machine
To really make the point of demonstrating how much I know longer give a f**k about odd numbers, instead of sharing my top 10, I’ve stopped on 9. Is it conventional to dislike an odd number – of course not, but for whatever reason, my brain has decided that odd numbers are the enemy. Thermostat, TV volume, my wedding date: they just need to be even. But like I say, I know longer want to waste time with this ludicrous habit and instead plan on learning how to use my (partner’s) coffee machine. Don’t get me wrong I’m an independent woman, but when he’s just so good at taking on the role of certified coffee-maker in our household who am I to argue?
So there it is. 9 little f**ks I have let go of, and 9 new things I’m going to give more time for. Like I say, there are so many more things I’ve mentally evaluated and prioritised in my brain space, but I’m seriously running out of characters. The point of writing this blog and sharing the beginning of my Not Giving a F**k Journey is simply to encourage others to try it too. This book was published in 2015. Why am I only just reading it now? Imagine all the f**ks I could have saved myself. If it wasn’t for this book, this blog would be non-existent. And even if no-one reads this but my mum (because mums have to) and my husband to be (because I’ve forced him into it) I genuinely don’t care. And that’s the whole point. Two weeks ago I cared too much about what people would think, to the extent that I would just rather not write. Well look at me now! So thank you Sarah Knight for you wise words of wisdom. She sold me a life-changing method, and my god she’s so right.
Beetroot Lattes + other BS 